Terrible Headshots - Vol. 7

Remember this gentleman? Well, he has some other poses now available that you may enjoy. Just keeping you updated!

Where to begin here? Important to touch up those photos before you print them out and mail them, don't you think? It's called HD, people, and it isn't kind. Hide those things for as long as possible.

Check out those guns! No, really, there are guns in this "headshot." I think this really shows versatility. She can play a sex slave, an assassin, a lawyer or the ethnic best friend!

I made it!

It's Friday! Thank you, Universe, for helping me make it through another week. Yesterday, the outlook on that actually happening was iffy at best.
This week, I aquired a balance ball chair for my desk at work, manufactured by the fine people at Gaiam. So, essentially, I sit on a bouncy ball all day and bounce. It isn't exactly comfortable, but I pretend it is so my employers don't think they were right when they told me they doubted I would last a week on it. Ha ha! I have lasted a week, so the joke is on them! And on my ass which is pretty much numb by the end of the day. We all have to make sacrifices.
Still doing P90X, but a wine and cheese party that I hosted on Tuesday night seriously derailed my meal plan. It also left an obscene number of used wine glasses piled on my kitchen counter that I haven't touched yet. It was all completely worth it though, as it resulted in some high quality girl friend time. I think that I am back on track now and am blessed with a four day work week next week, followed by a 2 day work week the following week and THEN another 4 day work week. There is a chance I will continue to survive somehow.
A week from today, I am going to visit my BFF in Austin where she will be graduating with her Ph.D. Yeah, she's really smart. I feel like I have also completed something. That something will likely turn out to be a bottle of tequila. Yay, Texas!

P90 eXcuse me?

Well, just so you know, I lasted about 2 hours without television. That was a stupid idea. I'm clearly not capable of that kind of commitment at this point in my life. Also, there was a place card for me at the previously mentioned wedding. Sadly, by the time that was communicated to me, I was in Oxnard at a thrift store formerly know as The Association of Retarded Citizens, but now called ARC. Apparently, if you refer to it as the Retarded Citizens Thrift Store in an Oxnard gas station, the proprietor of said gas station will know that you are "not from Oxnard, huh?" I guess some drama went down in that town over their beloved second hand shop. Anyway, I heard it was a beautiful wedding.
Fitness Update:
I have quit boot camp. I know this won't come as a complete shock to most of you. What is shocking is how long I actually went. There are various reasons for my departure, but the main one is that I really wasn't loosing any weight and although we can pretend all day that I just want to "feel better" and "get healthy," I think in our heart of hearts we all know what the real goal is. So, I've come up with a new way in which to torture myself - P90X. Every heard of it? I'm about to close out my second week on the program. If you've never actually done it, you should know that it is not only an at home exercise program, but also a nutritional program. The workouts are very difficult and the diet is strict. If this doesn't work, I have no idea what will. I do live in LA, so I guess the next option is lipo. Speaking of which, does anyone have a baseball bat I can borrow? I need to beat the shit out of a bathroom scale, Office Space style.
Apt Update:
Yesterday when I was doing Yoga X (P90X yoga for superheroes), I was half way through a sideways twist when I noticed that there was a large unpainted circle on the wall above my bathroom door. I also realized that the smoke detector that used to be in that spot was now in the living room over top of a painting, off centered. At first I thought, wow, has that always been like that? No, certainly not. I wouldn't have been able to stand #1 the unpainted circle or #2 the off centered painting. I was pretty pissed because obviously my building manager had authorized someone to come into my apartment without my permission and replace/move the smoke detector. I also suspected that they had come in without my permission on another occasion several months ago when I found a piece of insulation on my balcony which I did not put out there. All day long, whenever I would look at that damn circle, I would get angrier and angrier. So, this morning, I called my very nice landlady and left her a message asking about the situation. She called me back and said that she had never sent anyone into my apartment to move the smoke detector!! She had called the maintenance man and he didn't know anything about it either!! She also assured me that the smoke detector had indeed been above the bathroom door as they are all in the same places in all of her apartments. WTF??! Who would come into my house and move a smoke detector? Very weird. She is having the locks replaced today and moving the smoke detector back where it was. Matt says I should call the police and report it just in case there is a serial killer on the loose who breaks into ladies' apartments and moves the smoke detector shortly before he comes back to murder them. AAAHHHHHH. I don't want to die! In case the murderer is reading this blog, go fuck yourself! I have a giant killer dog now who will eat your face off if you come in again.